It Takes a Village
If you’ve heard this saying once, you’ve heard it a million times. Most of the time we hear this saying for young couples raising a baby for the first time, but today it had some new meaning for me.
Earlier this morning I saw a Facebook post from a sorority sister that I haven’t talked to in a while. She has been through a tremendous amount of loss over the past year. I commented on the post early on in the day letting her know that I was thinking of her and commending her for her strength through it all. Then about 4 hours later I saw that same post, but this time when I scrolled I saw comments from our previous chapter advisor, friends and family of this girl, other women like myself who were not particularly close to her, but yet we took the time to all support her in that moment.
These people commenting on her post didn’t say “loss is something that happens move on”. They didn’t say “we are tired of seeing the negative posts all of the time, stop venting on Facebook”. They said things like “I love you”, and “don’t keep these things in” and “I can relate and I pray for strength for you”, but most importantly they reminded her that she is not alone in this. They were her village in that moment that she needed them most.
This is something that I have experienced throughout my life, but I feel that I am just now able to appreciate this amazing world that we live in, and how important having a village can be. Since moving back to my hometown and starting a new business I have seen this happen in an AMAZING capacity and for that I am beyond thankful. I have had people offer to help with housing, who have said “yes bring me business cards, I’ll put them out”, who have said “I will take time out of my day to help you”, who have shared numerous Facebook posts trying to support me and this life I am working hard to build.
These people didn’t have to do any of those things that they did. They didn’t have to take the time out of there day to share kind words with a sister, they didn’t have to offer to help out, they didn’t have to take the extra few minutes to listen while I was stressing, but they all CHOSE to be there. So often as a therapist I hear things like “well I don’t want to burden others” or “I have a support system but they are busy with their own lives so I don’t talk to them about it”. We all have to rely on our village at one point or another and I promise that you will have the opportunity to be someone’s village as well. We don’t get to be our best selves by doing it alone; we do it with the support of our village.
The saying “it takes a village” doesn’t stop when we become adults, sometimes this statement sounds more relevant than ever. It takes a village to help you through tough times, it takes a village to start a new business, it takes a village to be an adult and to deal with the tough things thrown at us. So one last time for the people in the back, it’s okay to rely on this village, it’s okay to not feel strong enough on your own, and it’s okay to talk about the pain and ask for help. We are all in the struggle of life together so don’t take it on alone, take it on with your village!